| I always say how I don't need you... But I'm always going to come right back to this... |
[13 Jun 2009|11:52pm] |
Oof. Well.
The last time I posted, I had just lost a job due to budget cuts and I had been ecstatic about it. You didn't hear about it in said post because I was trying to be discrete. I know myself well enough to know that any post on the subject posted that soon after the event would be pure emotion, and filled with little tiny exaggerations that may have been... well... considered libel.
So it's been over a year later since my last post and what's been happening?
Still glad I and that job went our seperate ways. I can see the good points now that I'm at a comfortable distance, but it wasn't the healthiest working relationship...
And I found a new job the day - literally - after that job ended. That lasted for three months before they dropped me. I was unemployed for a month or two before I found the next gig. It was a nice little gig: great co-workers, excellent office environment, simple and enjoyable work duties. They seemed to like me, they even kept me around 9 months longer than they could have.
But then... remember when there was that little period a few months ago where the entire financial world imploded in on itself and anyone who had a toe in the financial waters was shitting themselves? Yeah.
It didn't happen immediately - my company was an international one, dealing in a fairly recession - proof product. But some cuts eventually had to be made, and my position turned out to be one of them.
Old song, same dance in some ways... but at least I've been productive with my downtime. Aside from a great part-time teaching job, I've been updating personal websites and reconnecting with my fandom fans.
My LinkedIn Site
My Fanfiction Twitter
My Personal Twitter
And I'm learning new and impressive hairstyles through YouTube....
Like these!
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| Massive Book Meme |
[04 Feb 2008|07:47pm] |
I recently had the pleasure of coming across ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) schmevil's LJ, and her many book lists.
Well, I was inspired.
So, in an effort to find some decent books, I'm snagging one of the book memes. I'm going to try to read everything on this list that I haven't finished or started at least once.
( Behind the cut, of course... )
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| PLEASE, PLEASE READ THIS! |
[11 Jun 2007|11:38pm] |
[x-posted to my journal on melvinawright.deviantart.com]
After a long, long, LONG discussion with myself, I’ve decided to go ahead with a project I’ve wanted to do for a while.
On Lulu.com, I’m going to be posting chapters of my lengthy humor/horror novel ‘Midwestern Transformation’.
My plan is to offer the first four chapters of the novel for free… and each additional chapters costing anywhere between $.99 and $1.25 to download.
A new chapter will be added each month and reader feedback will play a major part in which direction the plot takes. Each chapter will be no less than 2000 words, and I currently have ten finished.
Once you download a chapter, paid or free, it is yours to keep. According to what I read when I signed up, there should always be a copy of the story on Lulu.com for you.
However, since I’ve never self published before, I’m not sure how well said plan will work.
Which is why I need feedback. Lots of it.
I’m urging everyone out there to go to the link below.
http://www.lulu.com/content/915473
Please be BRUTAL and let me know what you think.
What do you like about it? What don’t you like about it? Is the Lulu.com website easy to use? What do you think of the way the story is formatted? Should I create a better cover and include illustrations?
Comment early, comment often.
Please.
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[05 May 2007|11:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 hopeful |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Fergie- Glamorous |
] |
Today’s has gotten me thinking about the future-tense.
After a nice long lunch, batting cages and a couple episodes of my new Venture Brothers Season 2 DVD, I gave Dad the last check for the car. I bought my car off of him a little over two years ago and I’ve been paying him back in monthly installments. I never thought I’d get it paid off.
I did some shopping with Mom today, got some little sundry things that I mostly needed but had been putting off getting. When I was still working as a temporary employee 13 months ago I couldn’t have gone shopping for such things often. And when I did go I’d wince and think about what I’d have to skip to make sure the purchases balanced out. But over a year later I have enough of a cushion to make those purchases pain-free.
When I was trying on a dress I looked in the mirror and didn’t wince. While my weight loss has been far from consistent, I’m in a weight class I had thought at one time impossible to get to. And, with a little more effort, I could be in a weight class I haven’t seen since before high school by September. Just in time for my best friend in high school’s wedding.
I picked up some strawberry plants at the Lowe’s I used to work at, and got sharp sympathy pains in my back. I remembered all the nights I worked out there, sometimes in +100 degree weather… all the weekends I had to sacrifice because of the schedule… driving home around 11:00PM soaked to the bone with sweat and water, aching everywhere and reeking from cleaning the toilets with rubber gloves only designed to repel paint. Even when work gets crazy now… I’m not working at Lowe’s. I have a boss who respects me and who wants to see me succeed. I have co-workers who’d care if I was dying in a gutter.
Picking up some eggs from the store I was helped by a cashier who knew me, through her boyfriend, from my Lowe’s days. We’ve always been friendly with each other, and we made small talk while she was ringing up the eggs. She asked if I was still working there. I said, no, I’m working elsewhere; a non-profit, clerical work. She seemed surprised and impressed, but she kind of blinked and said “God, where have I been?”
She had stayed still. I had somehow managed to move ahead.
No life is perfect. And admittedly there are a few things I’d love to change about mine. But today has given me a true glimpse into one of the first rules of happiness: Wanting what you have. Today I could see clearly that I’m living the future I wanted to a year ago.
And that the future I want for myself now could be no more than a year away.
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| Yay! Commission! |
[12 Apr 2007|09:57pm] |
I sold a "Choose Wisely" sticker from my Loveless Collection on Cafepress. Booyah baby! I'm now about a quarter of the way towards having Cafepress cash me a check.
Awww yeah.
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| Something adorable is afoot... |
[29 Mar 2007|09:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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hopeful |
] |
So my mom has had a gentleman admirer. He's one of the few other singles in our condo complex. I've met him from time to time at various condo get togethers.
Between his shyness and my determination for mom to have a life of her own, I haven't seen much of him lately. But I have seen his actions.
He's done several adorable yet practical things for mom that clearly show his admiration for her. I can't mention any of said things here as mom would skin me alive. But trust me when I say that these actions show that he understands Mom and cares for her.
And just now, as I was busy trying to drum up new readers for Three Part Harmony on the dA chatrooms, Mom called and left a message on the machine.
She says she's just across the street and she didn't want me to worry.
No mention of when she's coming home. No mention of what they're doing. That's unusual in and of itself.
AND her voice sounded nervous and hesitant. Like she doesn't know if she should be doing something.
Sounds like things might be getting serious. /-grin-/
...well, knowing Mom, probably not.
But a girl can hope! Hell, at least one of us should be having fun.
On one of our local radio shows were having "Sexual Camels" (women who could go long stretches of time without sex) call in.
I almost did.
Then I realized how "I haven't gotten any in 2+ years, and My God I would have shot someone by now if it wasn't for porn..." would sound over the air.
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| Putting stuff down and picking stuff up... |
[17 Mar 2007|11:48pm] |
Well, I didn't go to the Deal or No Deal audition. There was a rumor that it might be a prank.
So I asked myself: "Self... would you rather sit in a line for hours on end, just so you can embarrass yourself for people who might never give you a shot at free cash? Or would you rather sleep in til 11AM, and head to your favorite cafe and write for two hours over cheesecake?"
Sometimes it's all in the way you ask the question.
Speaking of weight, I have gained some of mine back. I'm at 220 right now and happy as a clam. I'm trying to run more often and get back on the portion control wagon. But I'm eating stuff without worrying if I'll have to fast the next day to take it off. And that feels good.
All this free spirited eating seems to have jogged my creative side. My long-standing writer's block may not be gone, but it's quickly crumbling. I think I've finally found the story line I want to use for my first novel.
AND I'm trying to finalize my business plan so I can take all of the little projects I've cooked up in the past year and a half and put them towards one financial goal.
Yessiree... I'm on my way to being one happy camper.
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| And now, the news. |
[13 Mar 2007|10:02pm] |
Well. It's official. Almost. At a 17 pound weight loss I may be the winner for our company's "Biggest Loser" contest. (I went from 231 pounds to 214.) But we have to wait for all the votes to get in before it's official. If I am the official winner I get a spa gift certificate that is valued at anywhere from $150 bucks to $200 bucks.
With the diet over, I've found my next project on the subject of self-improvement... there's going to be an open casting call for Deal or No Deal in Akron in a few days... and I'm going to be there. Hey, I'm in good shape. No reason not to flaunt it.
We also had a small earthquake here in Ohio last night. My dad and I were having pizza over at his house when it hit. Freaked me out for a second, but it was kind of cool. Like putting your feet on a vibrating foot massage. Of nature.
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| Taking a fresh new look at life... |
[07 Mar 2007|08:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 Help? |
] |
Well, I managed to be a cranky little shit at work today. There really was no good reason for it. I had just subconsciously decided during the course of the day that I hated all of humanity and I wanted everyone to drop dead. And no, I don't mean all of humanity BUT me. I mean ALLLL of humanity.
I was trying to do my best to snap myself out of it, since it's not a good idea to hate your species when you have to work in close quarters with them. It could be said that one of the benefits of having a job where people rarely talk to you is that it takes them a while to notice these things.
And while I was snapping myself out of it, I think I got to the root of why I felt so cranky. I feel like nothing I do matters lately.
So I decided to start working towards doing something.
( Cut for plotting and random lists... )
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| Bad day... |
[27 Feb 2007|10:49pm] |
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mood |
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 cranky |
] |
Grrr.....grrrrrrrr...... GRRRRRRRRR!!!... GRRRRRRRRRRAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHRRAAAAAAAARH!
/-snort-/ /-spit-/
Grrrrr.....
... and I get to do it again tomorrow.
Woopie fucking doo.
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| Everything has a bright side in 2 feet of snow... |
[15 Feb 2007|10:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Little Less Conversation- Extended Mix |
] |
Now, there is alot about my job that can be exhausting. Not to mention infuriating in that I haven't quite learned certain aspects by rote yet.
However, you can't beat a job that pays you when they they have to call a snow day. Or three.
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| The gears may be squeaky, but they're still turning. |
[12 Feb 2007|10:15pm] |
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mood |
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grumpy |
] |
After a review of Writer's Digest's homepage for it's Short-Short story contest I've re-realized that the cut off date for contact if you were one of the finalists was last friday.
Since no drum majorettes with streamers and oversized checks have parachuted in, I think I can safely assume "Could Be Worse" is eligable for rewrite and submission elsewhere...
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| Damn You Orbitz! |
[29 Jan 2007|10:04pm] |
Because of my trip down to San Diego for the ComicCon, I got on Orbitz's mailing list.
They are having some killer deals on European travel right now.
If I had vacation time coming up I could be in Paris for the start of spring. The ticket's only 800 bucks.
/-whimper-/
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| Strange Realization... |
[11 Jan 2007|11:52pm] |
So, I'm browsing YouTube (my personal substitute for a social life) and I come across a video with a morbid chain letter in the comments section.
Something about carved up prostitutes being found in the 1940's and now that you've seen this message you'll have to post this one particular word... and hell if I can remember what it was, it had alot of repetitive K's and A's and N's in it... you'll get cut up like the hooker. Or you'll be compelled to cut up hookers yourself. I was trying to back-click so I didn't quite get everything.
What I did get was a definite Oh Shit feeling from the whole thing.
Not because of the content, but because it was a CHAIN letter.
Because as much as I hate to admit it I do take far more stock in chain letters than I should. I think it's the whole karmic aspect to it. With a pinch of not knowing enough people to save my sorry ass should a serious situation like it arise. Long story.
But then I thought about it. Did I really want to cling to life that much? At work, the first two weeks back from the winter break have been hell. Particularly this one. All I'm looking forward to at this point is completing a massive attendance project, doing a couple of flyer mailings, then sleeping in for the MLK weekend.
But the more I think about it, the less my MLK weekend will be what I want it to be. My weekends usually aren't. Oh sure, I start off things with lofty plans about going for a walk or getting writing done. You know. Mad crazy dreams that most would realize as unachievable. But most of the time I get roped into doing tedious little errands with my mother (part of the rent when you live with a parent) and wasting what time I have left desperately trying to relax. It's gotten me into a massive slump. And that's a slump that's both creative, emotional and socially.
I've been trying out new projects, and looking into an unusual part-time job prospect. But none of it seems like it'll work out. And to make matters WORSE global warming has deserted us and the Ohio winter is everything that it has ever been. Cold, miserable and capable of draining the spirit from your soul.
Now, to be fair I did just watch the new Keira Knightly screen adaptation of Pride and Prejudice. And that will put anyone in a good mood. But it's effects last only as long as the movie plays. I can't walk around in all my other day-to-day activities playing the movie over and over again. I couldn't even do that with Harry Potter porn, and you can print most of that stuff out.
So if any of you see on the news that a chunky woman with long strawberry blonde hair was horribly mutilated in the Midwest, please don't worry. I've gone to a better place.
Which is, at this point, any place that isn't Ohio.
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| New Year's Resolutions |
[01 Jan 2007|09:50pm] |
1) Get down to 190 lbs. (I actually GAINED 10 pounds this holiday season, so a refresher in restraint is needed.)
2) Write and sell a full length novel.
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